(A/N: I wrote this for the contest that is being held at Club-Kittycon, and for the sake of LOL's. :3 Also, I needed to take a break from writing pervy fanfiction, and get some funny fanfiction written. C8 It also helped that I watched loads of funny stuff while writing this. I had an excellent source of inspiration! XD
Bumblebee chortled with mischievous glee as he got down on his servos and knees, crawling his way underneath Ratchet's examination berth in the med-bay. The yellow Autodog's tail couldn't stop wagging as he carefully hooked up the small machine he was carrying in an inconspicuous nook under the berth. With that done, he backed his way out, still chortling. "Heehee, oh man, I can't wait to see the looks on their faceplates! This is gonna be hysterical!" the Autodog said, rubbing his servos together eagerly as he set about a new task, which involved setting up a hidden camera, disguised as an oil can, in front of the examination berth so it could catch all the action. Bumblebee was so focused on his task that he didn't hear the sounds of footsteps behind him, and he nearly jumped out of his metal plating when a massive servo descended upon his shoulder.
"Whatcha doing in here, Bumblebee?" The giant green Autodog, Bulkhead, asked his smaller friend. Bumblebee pressed a servo over his spark, taking several deep intakes before replying, "Whoo, don't sneak up on me like that, Bulkhead! Ya nearly gave me spark failure!" He regained his composure, and he grinned at the giant mech, "As to what I'm doing, I'm playing a prank on old Ratchet! He's supposed to be giving Prime a checkup soon, and I'm gonna play a joke on him!"
"You're playing a prank on RATCHET?" Bulkhead echoed, optics widening and doggie ears pricking upright with surprise. "Woah, you must either be very brave, or you have a death wish or somethin'." Bumblebee chose to ignore that comment as he resumed setting up the hidden camera, remarking to his friend, "I tell ya, this will be the greatest prank ever! It'll be even better than that time I rigged that bucket of paint to fall on Prowl while he was doin' his ninja exercises!"
The green Autodog pulled a wry face. "Yeah, I recall that you ended up going to Ratchet to get his shurikens removed from your forehead as a result of that little joke."
"Er, yeah... But my big mistake there was coming back to check and see how the prank went," Bumblebee coughed nervously, recalling the incident all too easily. "But this time will be different! See, I learned about this 'hidden camera' stuff from Sari, and she showed me how it all works, and how to set it up and everything. I'm just rigging it up to transmit the live feed wirelessly back to my room so we can watch all the fun."
Bulkhead scratched one of his ears as he watched Bumblebee setting up the camera. He wasn't entirely keen on getting drawn into this dangerous scheme of Bumblebee's, seeing as how his pranks had a tendency to either backfire on him, or he ended up being the victim when the subjects of his pranking sought him out to get their revenge. And here he was, planning on pranking Ratchet, of all bots! The yellow Autodog would be extremely lucky if there was enough of him left to be used as spare parts. And yet, he was interested to know as to what this prank actually was all about. His common sense and his curiosity waged a war within his processor, and in the end it was the latter option that won out. So he ended up tagging along behind Bumblebee as the smaller Autodog made his way back to his room, snickering and giggling all the way.
"So, what's the prank this time around?" Bulkhead asked as they entered the yellow bot's room, closing the door behind him as Bumblebee made for his TV, turning it on and tuning it to the right channel so it displayed the visual feed from the hidden camera.
"It's a surprise," Bumblebee winked, making room for Bulkhead so the giant could sit down and watch the show unfold. "But I guarantee you that you'll be in for loads of laughs!"
Neither mech had to wait very long before Ratchet returned to his med-bay with the Autodog leader, Optimus Prime, behind him. The younger of the two mechs got up on the examination berth and lay back, allowing the older Autodog to begin his checkup. "This shouldn't take too long, Prime. A couple of cycles, and you'll be free to go."
"Heehee, now the fun REALLY begins!" Bumblebee snickered, picking up a remote control that Bulkhead hadn't noticed before. Fighting back his giggles with some effort, the yellow Autodog waited until Ratchet was just starting to examine the Prime's abdominal region before pressing the big red button on the remote, and what happened next took Bulkhead completely by surprise.
Ratchet's optic ridges shot upright and almost right off his face, and he gaped at Optimus Prime, who's normally blue faceplates had turned a mortified shade of red. "T-That wasn't me, Ratchet!"
"Well, it definitely wasn't ME, Prime!" The grizzled old Autodog scowled. "You've been drinkin' some bad antifreeze or somethin'? Some of that synthetic slag can wreak havoc on a mech's internals..."
"But it wasn't me!" Optimus's face turned even redder, appalled that the older mech would even consider that he, a Prime, would be so crass as to let loose such a rude noise within the hearing range of others.
Ratchet stared at him long and hard, as if unwilling to believe that the Prime was telling the truth. And meanwhile, back in Bumblebee's room, the yellow Autodog was having a ripping good laugh about the whole thing; he had literally fallen flat on his back, and was clutching his mid-section, tears of laughter filling his optics as he whooped, "AH-HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Didja see the looks on their faces!? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh man, that's just too hysterical!"
Even Bulkhead could not contain his guffaws, and the giant Autodog shook with mirth. "Hahahahahaha! That is pretty funny! How did ya do it, little buddy?"
Still shaking with laughter, Bumblebee sat up and gave him the remote control. "It's something called a 'fart machine', and it's great for pranks! It works by pressing the button in this remote, and the longer you hold the button down, the longer the fart becomes! Here, you try it!"
"Heehee, okay!" Bulkhead grinned and pressed the button on the remote, breaking out into fresh gales of laughter as the machine underneath the examination berth responded dutifully.
Ratchet, who had just gotten through shrugging off the assumption that Optimus had made the earlier noise and had started his examination once again, jumped slightly as a louder, even ruder noise rang out, and he scowled darkly at Optimus. "What the slag, Prime?! Are you SURE you ain't been drinking anything bad for ya?"
"I'm telling you that's not me! I swear it on my spark!" Optimus was looking absolutely mortified, and was wishing that he could disappear on the spot.
The two pranksters were beside themselves with hysterics, and Bumblebee leaned on Bulkhead for support as his chassis began to ache from all the laughing he was doing. "WHOO-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Oh man, this is GOLD! My turn!" He grabbed the remote and sat waiting for just the right time to press the button, and Bulkhead crammed his servos into his mouth, waiting with a baited intake.
Back in the med-bay, Ratchet was nearly at his wit's end. Still under the assumption that there was something wrong with Optimus Prime's internals, he kept the Autodog leader pinned firmly on the berth, ignoring his cries of protest as he scanned his midsection determinedly, hoping to find the cause of this rather rude and noisy problem.
"Nothing is wrong with me, Ratchet! Why won't you believe me?!" Optimus cried, thoroughly humiliated as he struggled to break free.
"Hold still, Prime! You're gonna---! Awww great, you've knocked my wrench onto the floor!" The old Autodog medic grumbled as he bent to pick it up. It was an opportunity Bumblebee couldn't pass up, not for a year's supply of video games, and he pressed the button on the remote control with everything he had.
Optimus Prime's optics grew round as truck tyres as Ratchet's face broke out into a furious blush, and he was hard pressed to smother a snicker of his own when the Autobot medic rounded at him with a glare, "Don't you even THINK about it, Prime!"
"I wasn't! Honest to Primus, Ratchet." Optimus replied, managing with huge difficulty to keep a straight face. Ratchet's expression was that of Doom itself as his optics looked underneath the medical berth. "Good, 'cause that sure as slag didn't come outta MY aft, no way in the Pit! It sounded like it came from underneath here...."
Back in Bumblebee's room, the yellow and green Autodogs were in paroxysms of laughter, and it was only pure luck that Bulkhead managed to gain enough control over his mirth to catch the image on the TV. "Oh! Oh-oh! Bumblebee, something's up!" He urgently shook his friend's shoulder, snapping him out of his laughing spell just in time to catch Ratchet reaching underneath the berth and yanking out his fart machine. For a Cybertronian minute, neither Bumblebee or Bulkhead moved as Ratchet examined the small machine, comprehension dawning on his faceplates.
Then, like some terrible primordial monster waking up from a deep slumber, Ratchet sprang into action. He dropped the machine and grabbed his wrench, swinging it aloft as he roared, "BUMBLEBEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! This has your name written all over it! You little grease-stain, when I get my servos on you, I'm gonna turn you into a pile of bolts!" Yelling and brandishing the wrench, the old Autodog medic ran out the med-bay, and Bumblebee and Bulkhead could only assume that he was heading for Bumblebee's room.
"YIKES! Time we weren't here, big buddy!" Bumblebee yelped and shot out of his room as if his tail was on fire. Bulkhead, knowing that if he was caught in the yellow mech's room he would be considered a fellow conspirator, bolted as well. Unfortunately for the two mechs, Ratchet caught sight of them as they rounded the corner, and he took off after them, shaking his wrench and yelling the most horrible threats in their direction.
Prowl, who was seated upon the roof of their hideout in a meditative posture and enjoying the relative peace and quiet, quickly found his peaceful meditation shattered as loud yelps and curses suddenly filled the air down in the yard, and the ninjadog looked down into the yard to observe Ratchet, hot on the tails of Bumblebee and Bulkhead, who were clearly running for their lives from the infuriated medic and his wrench of destruction. Prowl watched the drama unfold without registering the least bit of surprise, and he was heard to comment, "Hmmm...Bumblebee's been playing pranks again, I'll wager. Some things just never change."
Having said that, he resumed his spot back on the roof and tuned out the sounds of Ratchet, whom judging by the yells and cries for help, had finally caught his two targets and was working out his revenge upon them. It was just like Prowl had said. Some things just never change.